Well I guess I really need to give this a try. The Dr said that it would help me. Or at least the lady that did my intake said it would help me. So I figure what the hell. I'll give it a try.
I'll start out by posting a little bit of information about myself.
I'm Elizabeth
I'm 24 almost 25 years old.
I'm married.
I have one child.
I suffer from depression and an anxiety disorder.
Thats really it. I'm not that interesting, crazy, yes but interesting? Not in the least bit.
Lately I've been having a REALLY hard time controling my temper. Granted the people I take it out on have it coming but I don't like going to that place. I become a different person when I am angry. And I don't calm down easy. Oh hell no I don't. I hold a grudge. And I don't let go until I get revenge. If you did something to me in Kindergarten then you can bet that one day I will get you back somehow. I guess thats the Evil bitch that comes out in me. I guess what my best friends say is true. I really have 2 personnas I have Beth she's sweet and fun and all around loving would never do anything to make someone mad and lets it roll off her back when someone does something to her. Then I have Liz, She's the person you don't wanna piss off. And if you DO piss her off I suggest you don't sleep. She's the one that can beat the hell out of a 320 lb man because he mouthed off to her. Piss her off and you better Run Forest Run. Most of the time I'm Beth, meek and shy hides the depression and anger and lets people walk all over her. But more and more lately Liz is coming out. I'm quick to anger and out for blood. No I'm not going to kill anyone.
I want out of this hole. I want to be happy. I don't want to put up with the bullshit that I do. I want to find Elizabeth again that happy medium between Beth and Liz. Will I ever find myself again? The person who is lost in an ocean of confusion anger and resentment. The person who used to have a love for life? The person I lost so long ago. I guess only time will tell.
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